This summer my husband and I began a cleansing, which we have read and heard is essential at creating a solid marital bond and in growing and moving forward in the dominant/submissive relationship. It was a phenomenal experience and I want to encourage all of you to do this. It's painful both outwardly and inwardly but it has brought us so much closer together. It is worth the work.
Submission is an act of letting go and trusting that the other person knows what is best and what is needed. It is an act of confessing to the need to be disciplined and allowing it to occur. It's hard but often times a woman can't submit because there are old things, past things, blocking her. Often times these are subconscious but sometimes they are things that have a great deal of power over the female psyche. For example, a past sin can keep a woman from presently submitting because subconsciously she feels she doesn't deserve to receive a clean slate for her actions. These past things must be addressed for her to move forward.
They can be as simple as telling a little white lie, to having a full blown affair. No matter how complicated the sinful past, the husband must address it, punish her for it, and then help her move on from it.
In a submission workshop I attended, we learned about a woman that had had sexual feelings for one of her husband's coworkers and she felt guilty even though it had been years ago and she never acted on those feelings. The workshop leaders, an established DD couple, explained how this woman was being held back by her feelings of guilt and not allowing herself to embrace submission or a clean slate from her husband. They recommended a cleansing program, wherein she confessed her indiscretion and guilt to her husband and he punished her and then offered her forgiveness. The woman gave a testimonial that it was so freeing that it changed their relationship for the better and now she submits to him without hesitation.
Others had bigger sins in their pasts, but the formula for revival was the same. That's what I want to share with you. My husband and I did this over the summer and we are in a much better place. It works and I don't think a DD relationship can move forward without it.
Step 1: Sit down together and talk about this. If she is having trouble submitting, discuss whether or not this could be the problem; especially if there have been indiscretions in the past.
Step 2: She must be willing to ask you to punish her for her past sins.
Step 3: She must be willing to write down those sins and to work through them one by one.
Example: On day one, you deal with the first issue on the list. On day two, the second issue and so forth.
Step 4: An agreed upon punishment must be laid out AHEAD OF TIME. For example: For lying, it is one spanking with one implement. The severity of the spanking depends upon the severity of the lie.
For an affair, it is a full two days of punishment, involving 3-5 spankings each day with several implements and corner time necessary for her to think about what she has done, her punishment and the offering of forgiveness and acceptance.
Step 5: The agreement is put into writing. "I, Sally, am asking, John, to help me overcome my past mistakes and teach me submission by confessing my indiscretion of sleeping with your coworker, admitting it was wrong and shameful, and asking you to punish me so that I can forgive myself and accept your forgiveness and be cleansed. I agree to a two day punishment of 6-10 spankings, corner time and anything you feel necessary to help me learn submission."
Step 6: Follow through is essential and must be done. The punishment sessions must be hard and long and more intense than anything you have experienced together. If she is not sobbing beneath your whipping, you have failed her. Part of the cleansing comes with the tears.
Step 7: Punishment sessions must be done naked.
Step 8: Punishment sessions must be consecutive days.
You will see a new life in yourself and your wife if you do this. I guarantee it. She may not know she needs this from you, but she desperately needs it and she will thank you for it when it is all over. You will have proven you are stronger than any of her sins and that your love for her is dominant over all other factors in this world. When she sees this and feels it on her bottom and believes it in her heart, submission will come easily.
Start this today!!!