Changing My Mindset

This morning I got a spanking that even I must admit was well-deserved.  I've been impatient with my husband and have copped an attitude.  It's hard though when he travels and I am left to handle the home, the kids and everything day-to-day on my own.  I get overwhelmed and lonely and I sometimes start to resent him.  I know he makes all of the money so sometimes I feel trapped in my world.  Even though I love my life and I'm blessed in so many ways that I can't even explain, all of them undeserved, I still sometimes feel like I'm suffocating.  It's hard to break out of this mindset and I start to even hate being around myself when I get like this.



This morning I was in that mindset and my husband had had enough.  He called me into his den where he works when he is working from home.  There's a small cushioned chair in the corner and he had turned it around so that the back was facing the middle of the room.  He told me to pull down my pants and bend over the back of the chair.  I started to complain and he swatted my bottom and told me my unwillingness to submit just earned me 25 extra swats.  Reluctantly, I pulled down my jeans and panties and bent over the chair.

He rubbed my bottom while he lectured me on my attitude and I felt like crying already, knowing what was coming.  He told me that my attitude was hurting our marriage and our family, and I knew he was right.  "What should we do about this?"  He asked.  "Are you able to stop this attitude on your own?"  He asked.  I didn't answer him at first and he swatted me twice with his hand.  "Are you able to stop this attitude on your own?"

"No," I whimpered.

"Then, what must we do about it?" He asked again.

"You should punish me for it," I said.

He rubbed my bottom again.  "I don't like to punish you," he said.  "But, our relationship and our family peace is more important than my dislike of having to discipline you.  Do you understand that?"  He asked.

"Yes," I said.

Then he explained that he was going to give me a long and hard spanking so that I would remember that my attitude effects everyone in the household and that I need to keep it all together. 

He started with his hand and spanked me until my cheeks were very red and hot.  Then he whipped me with the strap until I began to cry.  Then he pulled me over his lap on the sofa and spanked me hard and fast with the wooden paddle.  The faster he spanks me the more it hurts and I cried hard.  Last, he had me lay down on the floor with my bottom pushed up into the air and he caned me 20 swats.  This left tiny bruises on my bottom, but my soul felt light and free and my attitude and outlook on life has greatly improved.

Instead of corner time, we both orgasmed and then he held me for a few moments.  When that was over, he rolled me over in bed and gave me a reminder spanking with his hand.  50 more rapid fire lashes. 

I'm smiling now and so is he.  I'm so grateful that he knows when to take the reigns and bring me to a better place.

Man Up Men

My husband wanted to write a few words today, so here it goes:

Choosing to live in a DD marriage isn't easy on men or on women.  It takes trust on both parts and open communication.  I don't usually enjoy knowing that I need to take Heather over my knee and discipline her, but I do it because I love her and I understand the benefits it brings to her and to us.

As a husband, knowing you must punish your wife by inflicting pain on her bottom is not easy.  There are times when I want to back out of it and let her off the hook but by doing so, my weakness hurts her in the long run.  And that can cause more damage than the initial poor behavior caused.

Women are lovely creatures, but men learned a long time ago that it is their job as head of the household to keep the woman in her place.  Now, I don't mean barefoot and pregnant with no dreams or hopes or successes.  Women are intelligent and in many ways superior to our own manliness.  We compliment one another well and part of that compliment is submission and dominance.

As head of the home, your job as her husband is to help her achieve her goals, to help her become what she wants to become.  This committment involves teaching her that there are consequences for all actions.  Her body is yours and thusly, you need to care for it and take care of it as if it were your own.  Men, we love to rub and stroke our woman's pussy but we must also realize that her bottom is our responsiblity too, and it must be stroked with a belt or a cane when necessary.  We cannot be weak and take the good and ignore the bad.  As a couple, we are a package deal which means we, gents, have to man up.

Heather has already explained that she gets a minimum of two spankings a week.  Since we established this, her behavior has had great improvement.  Read her notes and institute these spankings into your marriage.  In addition, I've been helping Heather learn to become submissive by giving her orders throughout the day, even when I am out of town.  I make her issue a self-spanking for no reason, film it and send it to me or do it via Skype where I can tell her how many swats and if she is being hard enough.  For her to bare her bottom and spank it when I say, is a huge act of submission.  I've also asked her to make herself orgasm while we are on the phone with one another.  Again, an act of submission.  If she refuses, she gets a spanking.  I don't know about your wife, but mine will take the orgasm over the spanking any day.

Get creative, men.  Help her succeed at submission and you will see your relationship come more alive than you ever thought possible.  Teaching her submission is not you being bossy or a bully, it's you manning up to your responsibility as her husband and teaching her how to make your marriage a better place.

Super Quiet Spanking Implements

I copied this information from another blog on spanking that I absolutely love.  Here is the link to that site where you can read this article and tons of other posts that will help you on your journey toward submission and dominance and learning the DD lifestyle.  I can't say enough about how great their website is, so go visit it now.

Spanking with implements such as a wooden paddle, or a belt, or a hairbrush, or even a hand can get awfully loud, particularly if the spanking is conducted bare bottomed. The last thing most domestic discipline couples want is for their children to hear the spanking, or anyone else to hear the spanking for that matter. In most spanking situations, the quieter it can be done, the better it is for everyone.

Given the frequency we get asked about quiet spanking implements, we felt it was best to simply dedicate an entire post to them. Quiet spanking implements are wonderful for those conducting spankings within earshot of others, but often times quiet spanking implements translate to a more intense sting for the one getting spanked. As a general rule, the less surface area of the buttocks the implement impacts, the quieter the spanking will be. Unfortunately for the one being spanked, this also means the impact of the strike is concentrated on a smaller surface area of the buttocks, resulting in a more powerful and intense initial stinging sensation. Just something to keep in mind when spanking with the following implements.

Quiet Spanking Implement #1: A Spatula With Holes

Solid spatulas are a bit on the loud side, however a spatula with holes is relatively quiet and ideal for any type of “brief” spanking. A spatula with holes is not recommended for an entire punishment spanking, however it’s effective for warm up spankings, reminder spankings, and maintenance spankings.

Quiet Spanking Implement #2: A Wooden Spoon

A wooden spoon is still rather loud on a bare bottomed spanking, however over some light clothing it’s fairly quiet. Like the spatula with holes, a wooden spoon is better suited for warm up spankings, reminder spankings, and maintenance spankings rather than a standard punishment spanking.

Quiet Spanking Implement #3: A Switch

For those that may be unfamiliar with what exactly a switch is, it’s simply a small tree branch/stick that has been prepared to spank with (leaves/bark removed, sanded down and smoothed out, etc.). A round switch with a small diameter covers a rather small surface area of the buttocks, making it very quiet upon impact. A switch does pack quite a sting and can easily cause welts, so it’s best to use caution when spanking with this implement.

Quiet Spanking Implement #4: A Tilt Wand

A tilt wand is used to open and close blinds. Like the switch, a tilt wand impacts a very small surface area of the buttocks which makes each strike rather quiet. If used incorrectly/excessively, a tilt wand can cause welts, so once again it’s best to use caution when spanking with this implement. The tilt wand offers a quick intense sting, however it generally isn’t very long lasting since tilt wands are not very dense (generally).

Quiet Spanking Implement #5: A Loopy Johnny

Like the switch and the tilt wand, the loopy johnny is a quiet spanking implement given it’s small surface area of impact. A loopy johnny is considered to be on the more serious end of the spectrum when it comes to spanking implements. It’s recommended it only be used by experienced couples for the most serious of offenses, and only in instances where the spanking absolutely must be quiet.

Quiet Spanking Implement #6: A Cane

While extremely quiet, the cane also offers the most intense stinging sensation of all the implements outlined in this post. The small impact area of the cane combined with its relative density make it a very very powerful spanking implement. It’s recommended a cane be used by experienced domestic discipline couples who are very familiar and comfortable with spanking in general. It’s also recommended to only be used for extremely serious offenses. Please use extreme caution if you and your partner choose to spank with the cane.

As you can see, all of these spanking implements (with the spatula being the only exception) have something in common – a very small area of impact. If you and your partner are considering spanking with something other than the implements listed, just remember this general rule – the smaller the area of impact, the quieter the spanking implement will be.

A New System of Spankings

My husband and I have been re-experimenting with ways to improve my behavior.  I'm fesity and I have trouble submitting to his authority.  I also have a smart mouth on me, which often gets me into trouble.  We've been thinking about doing a three day boot camp again, which I'm not looking forward to because I know I won't be able to sit down for a week afterwards, but it does our relationship so much good. 

Here are the things we're working on now:

Every week on Friday morning I get a "preventative" spanking.  This is a hard OTK spanking and it's mainly to release the stress and frustration that has built up over the week so that we can have a peaceful weekend together.

Every Monday morning before he leaves town, I'm given a "maintenance" spanking.  This usually involves tools and I am whipped pretty hard.  Our last session was over 15 minutes and he didn't stop until I was crying. 

So, regardless of my behavior, I receive two spankings a week, which I was against at first, but since we started doing it, I have noticed I've received less and less punishment spankings.  Which is good because my punishment spankings are the worst and they involve corner time.  My last punishment spanking took over 30 minutes and he used five instruments. My butt was sore for days, but I deserved it.  I was disrespectful to him and I used language like a sailor. 

So, back to our routine.  Every Monday I get a "maintenance" spanking and every Friday I get a "preventative" spanking.  In between, I receive punishment spankings if necessary and/or "infraction" spankings.  If we aren't alone and I've misbehaved, he will issue a 10-20 swat "infraction" spanking, letting me know that as soon as we are alone, my bottom is going to get blistered.  If I get 3 infraction spankings with no time for a punishment spanking, there are serious consequences to follow.  First, I have to stand in the corner with my panties down around my ankles and wait for him.  Then, when he comes in, he puts me over his knee and lectures me about my behavior while my bare bum is exposed.  Next, I have to confess to him what I have done wrong, which is usually a lot.  He says its important that I confess it so that I understand why I am being punished.  Then, I must ask him to punish me.  Sometimes he makes me be very specific in asking and I know he wants to humiliate me a little more so I learn my lesson.  I have to ask him specifically for a certain tool and for a certain number of swats.  I really know I'm being punished when he stops half way through and sends me back to the corner, instructing me to masturbate to relieve the sexual build up I'm feeling.  Then, after I orgasm, he takes me back over his knee and renders the rest of the punishment until I am weeping in his arms.  After I stop crying, he asks me if I've learned my lesson and judging from my emotion, he determines if I need to be whipped further, which is usually a yes.  By the end, I can't wait to get his lovely, erect penis into my mouth and glorify him.  After he climaxes, I am sent back to the corner to think about my behavior and the consequences of it.  When I have come to terms with everything, I am to come to him and apologize and thank him for giving me a clean slate.  If I don't feel it is clean and I am still holding a grudge or have a bad attitude, he gives me 50-100 more swats, usually with his belt.

It may sound hard and harsh, but our marriage is so wonderful when I submit that it is worth every stroke on my backside.

We are also working on self-spankings for when I over-eat or curse and he is out of town.  Right now, I text my confession to him and then he texts back how many swats and what instruments I am to use.  Then, I have to record my spanking and send the video to him for approval.  If he says it is adequate, I am free to pull up my pants and go about my day.  If not, he assigns more swats and I have to record another video.  It's been working really well.  I've lost 13 pounds toward my goal weight and have had to give myself 5 very hard, very long spankings.