Here are some pointers:
1. Invest in a silent tool like a Loopy Johnny or a plastic hanger will work.
2. Get a mindset that spankings will be quick and quiet and that any type of sexual gratifications will most likely be delayed until later.
3. Come up with a code that the children do not recognize, but that tells your partner to go to the designated room and prepare for a spanking. (If our children are home my husband touches the front of his belt buckle and I know that I need to go prepare.)
4. The bathroom is a good place to administer discipline because you can turn on the shower or the fan to mask sound.
5. Administer quick swats with a silent tool and then follow it with corner time. If the message hasn't gotten through, administer another set of swats followed by more corner time.
6. The moment an infraction is made issue discipline immediately. This is crucial to the success of the dominant/submissive, loving relationship. If you do not hold your partner accountable immediately they will begin to dis-respect your authority and they will begin to feel unloved and unnoticed.
7. Don't make the mistake of taking it easy or being overly gentle during discipline. If a rule was broken, punishment is earned. It's that simple. You are not being mean by giving your partner the discipline they deserve. In fact, if you intentionally don't give a harsh spanking that has been earned, you are causing more damage than good.
8. If you are new to DD or if you have taken a long break from it for whatever reasons, start over with a training period/boot camp. That means each morning begin the day with a maintenance or reminder paddling and naked corner time. Again, the bathroom is the ideal place for this. Get up before the kids are awake, have your partner strip naked, bend her over the sink or the tub or your lap and issue a sound spanking with a quiet tool. Send her immediately to the corner so that she can process your authority and her decision to submit to it. This is very important to start her day off with the right mindset. Likewise, before bed, after the kids are asleep, give her another maintenance spanking or address issues where she may have wavered in attitude or action during the day. The goal is that every time she sits down she is reminded of your love and the safety of your authority.
These steps will help you but you've got to commit to doing them. No arguing and no begging. We have a rule in our home, if I argue or beg, it's 50 swats with his belt on top of whatever discipline I have already earned.